Fiction and life . . . from the desk of Gwen M. Plano
  • Home
  • Blog Reflections
  • REDEMPTION THRILLER
  • THE CONTRACT Series
  • My Memoir
  • Poetry
  • About

Two calendars...

4/24/2018

12 Comments

 
by Gwen M Plano
We carry two calendars in our heart. One tracks the tragedies, the other our joys. We usually don’t think about these interior calendars, until someone or something hurts us. It is then that we become aware of the past month, the past year, and our life in general.

We use these inner calendars as a measurement of the worthiness of life. Though not visible markers of time, they hold real events. When our tragedies overlap, we can lose balance and with it, our sense of perspective. It is then that we say things, harsh things, about ourselves or others. Hurt becomes all that we know, and we lash out. We want others to feel our pain.

If laughter fills the months of our other calendar, we live unaware of its shadow. We see but don’t see the suffering around us. We live oblivious to pain and imagine joy is our right. Because of this, we are even more upset when hardship comes our way. We question why me.

My calendar of the last twelve months is very full. Medical challenges and my mom’s passing top the list, but there were other difficulties as well. If it weren’t for my friend Joyce, I might have been overwhelmed.

Joyce is wheelchair-bound. Guillain-Barre changed her life overnight. Her courage and determination help others summon the same. Though I don’t have a fraction of her strength, her example provides a direction for me. She chooses to see beauty rather than brokenness, and irrespective of the difficulty, she sees a gift.
​
We are surrounded by hurting people. The impatient clerk at the grocery store, the rude driver on the freeway, the yelling couple down the street. We are not alone, but alone we stand unless we reach. This song from R.E.M. hit home for me; perhaps it will for you as well. ♥ 
12 Comments
john howell link
4/25/2018 06:38:26

Yes, it is true everyone hurts. I think the difference between those that hurt rests in how that hurt is manifest. Rudeness, impatience, means are symptomatic of a poorly center person. Those who suffer with dignity have a larger scope and take that suffering as a sign of grace. To be tested and remain steadfast in faith is an opportunity to grow the spirit. I liked your calendar discussion, Gwen. I had not thought of life in that term before. Well done and thank you.

Reply
Gwen Plano
4/25/2018 11:14:54

Thank you, John. Some folks, like my friend, radiate grace. And, that grace reaches so, so many of us. Blessings.

Reply
John Fioravanti
4/25/2018 07:38:45

I've not heard of looking at life in the perspective of the two inner calendars either, Gwen. Your reflection reminded me of Aristotle's discussion of virtue as the Golden Mean between the excesses of pain and joy - in this case. Thank you for this beautifully-written perspective.

Reply
Gwen Plano
4/25/2018 11:16:35

Thank you, John. I hadn't thought of the two calendars until recently, when I was thinking over the year. All the best to you...

Reply
D.L. Finn
4/25/2018 08:07:10

This is one of my favorite bands and this song is a light in dark periods. Music and its message have held me up many times. I have never thought about having two calendars inside-- of good and bad times but I think we all do that to some extant save the good and bad. It is easy to get stuck in either one, in our pain or hiding from our pain, very true. In both we find people to share it with us but the person holding us up is our gift. I guess we have to balance these extremes knowing there will be bad and good celebrating both life and death of all situations. I am thankful Joyce had been there for you. I find a person I least expect shows up for that role in Dark times. Angels that do help us hold on for better times that always follow with us a bit wiser. Thank you for this thoughtful and honest post Gwen. A good reminder none of us are ever really alone.Sending you lots of healing hugs Gwen.

Reply
Gwen Plano
4/25/2018 11:19:25

Thank you, dear Denise. It is amazing how we are helped during difficult times. As you know so well, angels are always very near. ♥

Reply
Vashti Q link
4/25/2018 10:42:48

Hello Gwen! You always make me think and that's great. I think I'm missing those calendars. My joys and pains tend to be swirled together somehow. I agree with John. I also think that how we manifest these hurts makes us who we are. Some may choose to manifest their pain through song or drawing and painting, others exercise or practice extreme sports, while many eat their sorrows and then there are writers––who bleed over their typewriters. ;) xx

Reply
Gwen Plano
4/25/2018 11:21:14

Thank you, Vashti. Your last comment made me smile, we writers do bleed over our typewriters, don't we. Blessings. :)

Reply
Jan Sikes link
4/26/2018 11:15:35

I've never thought of the internal calendars, Gwen. Great analogy. You are right. We all hurt. We all go through hard times, but it is during those times we have the most potential to grow stronger. As always, you wrote a profound and thought-provoking post. Hugs!

Reply
Gwen Plano
4/26/2018 17:30:51

Thank you, Jan. You are so right, during the difficult times, we have the most potential to grow stronger. Blessings. ♥

Reply
Joyce Arnold link
4/26/2018 12:46:45

Gwen, you are a blessing, a mystery, a friend and always a surprise! As I look back I sometimes think I had the last great parents. My dad would always say, or did he ask, “do you really want to know what is around the next corner or over the upcoming hill.” As I look back on my calendars (I love the analogy) I KNOW they have been filled with joy and pain, I KNOW of God’s great love for me.

I am the winner of the golden ring on the health carousel of life ~ Guillian-Barre. A word I had never heard, a syndrome I knew nothing about and later understood that 80% of those chosen enjoy a full recovery within one year. On my tragedy calendar, is was only when I said “thank you” even though I did NOT mean it that I began to be open to grace. As a totally paralyzed person with others saying you are such an inspiration, I would scream within that YOU are crazy, how am I an inspiration, I CAN NOT move!!! At the two year point, as a kind person was leaning over me with their hand on my shoulder saying yet again, “you are such an inspiration.” I started to come face to face with my joy calendar which had been overlapped and lost from my balance. Without being invested I said “Thank you”
With that thank you came the beginning of an understanding I was chosen through the grace of Christ to share in being an inspiration. Today, soon to be 22 years later, I am still amazed when anyone says you are an inspiration. I am grateful my glass is always half full, I want to sense goodness, love and beauty of nature. In my Guillian-Barre travel, I am in the 5% with ongoing limitations… missed the 80% full recovery but have grown in grace and thankful to be helpful to others. AND again, thank my dad for hearing, “you never know what you say or do and how it will affect others.

Thanks, Gwen for your kind words and friendship!!!!!

Reply
Gwen Plano
4/27/2018 03:04:05

Thank you, dear Joyce. Because of you, we see more fully the grace of God. ♥

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    For blog updates, please subscribe below. 
    * indicates required

    RSS Feed


    Archives

    March 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    June 2019
    December 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013

Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way. ―Viktor E. Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning


Plano Enterprises, LLC
Photos used under Creative Commons from Kevin M. Gill, Joel Bedford, qthomasbower, crosescribe, Juho Holmi, diana_robinson, W Presley & B Kunce Photography......WI. USA, U.S. Geological Survey, Ian Sane, florianric, NikoMC, van Van Es, Yen Chao 趙彥, MissMessie, Yuriy Kuzin, Ben Zvan, Bichuas (E. Carton), Nina Matthews Photography, hehaden, alexdecarvalho, Tim RT, Kurdistan Photo كوردستان, Candida.Performa, peddhapati (Thanks for 1M Views!!!), Jhong Dizon | Photography, Waheed Akhtar Photography, lawmurray, USFWS Pacific, JalilArfaoui, SurFeRGiRL30, Lauren Finkel Photography, maf04, SantaRosa OLD SKOOL, Dakiny, vauvau, Zanastardust, Monica's Dad, timpeartrice, marumeganechan, Rafael Acorsi, seyed mostafa zamani, Jorge Franganillo, Irene Grassi (sun sand & sea), The National Guard, D.Fletcher, nada abdalla, Ted LaBar, alison.mckellar, Infomastern, Elvert Barnes, m01229, theglobalpanorama