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The Final Goodbye...

9/16/2017

12 Comments

 
by Gwendolyn M Plano
Picture
​We all face them – the final goodbyes to loved ones. Almost a year ago, my dad passed away. Now, my mom is preparing for the same journey. Tears come easily these days and with those tears, memories.

I hadn’t expected to travel back to my childhood while watching mom take her leave, but scenes have resurrected drawing me through the years, to exchanges between mom and me. One such scene follows...

I was about 5 or 6 years old and was helping mom with the wash. We had a Maytag wringer washer outside in the shed. She was busy with the fifth baby and asked me to wring the clothes and hang them on the line.

All was fine - until my hair got caught in the rollers.

     “Do you remember that day, Mom?”

     “Oh yes, I remember. I was feeding your brother when you screamed. I laid him on the floor and ran out to see what was the matter.”

     “I was so scared, mom. I couldn’t move; my head was against the washing machine.”

     “I know, your hair was entangled in the rollers. When I got to you, I immediately pulled the plug and unscrewed the roller cover to release the pins. I was scared too, Gwen. It could have been much worse.”

Mom glanced at the floor as a tear rolled from her eye.

     “I did the best I could,” she whispered.

     “Mom, you gave each of us so much. Look at us now, the seven of us, we’re doing well. You taught us how.”

     “Well, I want you to know that I tried. I realize now how much I depended on you, even when you were little.”

     I smiled and said, “I think that’s why I became a school administrator, mom. I didn’t need any training to do that job.”

Mom giggled, and in that instant, I saw her as a little child and me as her mother.

     “Rest now, okay? I love you very much and am so grateful for all that you’ve done for me and everyone else.”

Mom closed her eyes, and I quietly wept.

​Soon, I will be saying my final goodbye.  

Picture
At a wedding about 4 years ago - Mom with her kids.
12 Comments
john howell link
9/16/2017 18:35:47

So many years of memories. You must feel fortunate to have your mom so long. It always comes down to what is best. To say goodbye and help the trip to the other side or to cling and hope for a little more time. I think you have loved your mom and she you without reservation. I hope the sadness of losing her will soon give way to the heart warming memories of a life shared. Bless your Gwen.

Reply
Gwen Plano
9/17/2017 09:14:30

Thank you, John. You know this path so well. I love the image of "heart-warming memories of a life shared." Blessings...

Reply
D.L. Finn
9/17/2017 09:11:41

It is never easy to say good bye... Even if you are prepared. I love your memory and can clearly see you bent over caught in the washer--calling for your mom. We always have our memories to carry with us when our loved ones aren't physically present with us. Sorry you are going through such a difficult time time. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Reply
Gwen Plano
9/17/2017 09:16:25

Thank you so much, D.L. You are right, we have our memories to carry with us. Tender and sweet, they bring us close to our loved ones. Blessings...

Reply
John Fioravanti
9/17/2017 09:15:30

I was moved by your memory and conversation with your mother. I didn't have that chance with my mom - my fault more than anything else. Your love and dedication to others is inspiring and I'm privileged to know you, good friend. Thanks for the picture - a gorgeous family!

Reply
Gwen Plano
9/17/2017 10:16:41

Thank you, John. Only recently have my sibs and I realized the gift that was given us over the years - through mom and dad's hard work. Blessings...

Reply
Jan Sikes
9/17/2017 11:09:15

Oh, dear Gwen, my heart breaks for you. You are right. It is NEVER easy to say goodbye...not even when we know it is best for them. Grief is a selfish act and one we cannot help. Prayers for you to find the strength you need to help your mom embark on this journey, knowing you will see her again. Big hugs.

Reply
Gwen Plano
9/20/2017 08:34:42

Thank you very much, Jan. I know you understand this journey deeply. Blessings...

Reply
Michelle Abbott link
9/18/2017 04:35:02

My heart breaks for you, Gwen. Saying goodbye is never easy. Hold on to those happy memories.

Reply
Gwen Plano
9/20/2017 08:35:29

Thank you, Michelle. I so appreciate your thoughtfulness. Blessings...

Reply
Davy D link
9/20/2017 03:29:35

Blessings and thoughts with you all Gwen, as you go through this journey.

Reply
Gwen Plano
9/20/2017 08:38:24

Thank you very much, Davy. All the best to you and yours...

Reply



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Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way. ―Viktor E. Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning


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